Whew!

At 6 am, I was outside beginning the last day of work on the yard, at least temporarily. I had hired the young man from down the street to come help me shovel the crushed rock, but he didn't show up until 9, so I sent him on his way without using him as I was 3/4 of the way done by then.

I not only had to bring in the crushed rock, but also had to bring in dirt to the areas where the ground was low so the crushed rock would be a finishing layer, but not too deep as it's expensive ground covering. I added dirt, watered it to level it, added the crushed rock, watered it again, and kept working the surface until it was level and smooth. Not perfect, but I'm good at puttering.

I am proud to say that at 10:30 am, a mere 4-1/2 hours after beginning, this part was finished. I'm still missing some rocks along the oleanders against the fence (where George's red car is parked), so I left a small pile of crushed rock on the driveway until I can fill in between the rocks and the paver patio. I'll try to finish up before son and I leave for Canada.

Yep, I bought both a ceramic pot (I filled it with day lillies, which I love) and the bird bath (on sale at K-Mart) so I could see some "decor" and not just pavers! I have a lead on a cement table in Joshua Tree that is also the deep red color, so I'll drive up there and see how much it will cost to add it to the patio. I'm also going to buy some copper lanterns, the kind that take candles, and use them to create ambiance. The big white lantern actually goes in the front yard, but I wanted to see how the lanterns would look before investing in 6 or so for this landscaping project.

Now, the best news is that Mike and Dave showed up to work on the house next door, which has been purchased by a lawyer who's buying up foreclosures and renting them. When Mike came over to ask me if I knew the nearest big box store, I asked him about making the doggie door fit. He looked it over, told me what he could do and how he could do it, and I offered to buy him the blade for his Skil saw if he could get the job done today. He's going to do it before he goes back to the house next door as he can work on that over the weekend and I'll be able to secure the house while I am gone this weekend. Hurrah!

So there you have it. My body aches from head to toe, but I did it! I landscaped my backyard and I did it all by myself. Mike did ask me about what I'm going to do for shade, and when I told him that my goal is to have a wooden shade structure similar to the one over the cement patio, he said he'd like to give me a bid on building it. I'm going to think about that during my travels the next 2 months and may just take him up on his offer when I am back home.

Off the Top of My Head

No one makes me laugh like Chelsey Handler and her program Chelsey Lately! I'd love to be as irreverent, blunt, and totally honest as she is and tell the whole world what I REALLY think, rather than keeping it hidden behind a facade of social politeness. This past week, there have been several times that I've wanted to take off the gloves and have my say, but I tamped it down and kept it inside -- and then wonder why I have difficulty sleeping. It's harder to do the right thing, darn it.

Barack Obama should be loudly denouncing the scathing black racism that passes for worship in his culture. If there were any (white) voters sitting on the fence, wondering if this is the time to vote for the first black president, I think the spate of recent overtly racial attacks against whites accompanied by choruses of Jesus Loves Me will keep him out of office.

I love my front yard! All the work I put into the desert landscaping paid off in a peaceful, quiet front yard that invites a person to sit and soothe. I hope the backyard turns out as nice and that I enjoy it as much as I enjoy the front yard.

I wish I could figure out a way to make the doggie door work, but it simply doesn't fit into the space it's supposed to occupy.

The craft project I'm working on could be really great or look totally amateurish: I'm wanting the really great result and will be pissed if I can't pull it off.

After spending an hour filling out the on-line application for Blue Cross insurance to replace my COBRA and save a couple hundred dollars every month, I doubt I'll be approved. In life, I'm actually a pretty healthy person, but on paper, I don't look so good: asthma (controlled), diabetes 2 (controlled), and 2 broken arms (healed) within 3 months of one another come across as suspicious. And I had to answer the question whether I have had anything to drink in the past 12 months honestly: I do have a glass of white wine every so often, perhaps 2-3 times a year!

There was nowhere on the form to say that I've been working 3-5 hours a day for the past month to landscape my backyard, moving large amounts of earth, as well as setting 200 12 x 12 pavers into place. No place to say that I've worked 2-3 jobs concurrently for the past 20+ years and not used up a lot of sick days.

What's going to sink me is having a glass of wine a couple of times a year!

I am SICK AND TIRED of the intimate discussions and photographs of the current crop of BABY BUMPS and protruding belly buttons! I DON'T CARE and I DON'T WANT TO SEE THE PICTURES, no matter how big the star is who's carrying the little bundle(s) of joy. And I don't ever again want to hear the term "baby bump." I'm rooting for BABY BULGE, which doesn't sound quite as cute and may turn the tide away from the over-exposure of pregnant women parading across the red carpets.

Finally, is anyone else tired of the "instant stars" that permeate our culture? In music, they are called "one hit wonders," but in TV land they are instant stars, the young people who garner fame from boob jobs, weird hair-do's, hanging out with well-known people, or doing anything so totally outrageous that they are featured on the evening news and parlay that into a career as ... a star. What happened to talent? to education? to skill? to earning a rightful place in the world? to being paid commisserate with what what knows and can do? Kim Kardashian is an example of an individual who is now the star of a TV show because ... she has a big ass? a boob job? a nasty attitude and demeaning treatment of her friends, family, and complete strangers? is a serial slut who sleeps her way onto the entertainment news? whose father is a well-known lawyer? whose step-father is a former athlete? who thinks the world revolves around her?

If society is going to propel people to prominence, perhaps the person so propelled should have some substance to support the exposure?

The Birthday Blunder

A recent trip to The LA Times Book Fair to celebrate my son's birthday was okay, but not the big event we anticipated. However, many authors were there to promote and sign their publications. One such author was personable, engaging, and witty as I asked him about his novel, written to coincide with a museum opening feting Bob Dylan. I asked that he sign the book with my son's name, but I told my son that he would receive the book after I finish reading it.

I cannot get into it. The character names are off-putting, with either deeply meaningful or playful names, such as Tieresias from the Greek tragedy Antigone, as well as the not-so-subtle play on Bob Dylan's name for the lead character. The dialog is reminiscent of a Dick Tracy cartoon: choppy, intended to be wise-cracking and filled with satire, but coming across as childishly amateur. The "film noire" approach probably would work if the novel were a screen play, but it's not and it doesn't. The setting of "Old Hollywood" is both trite and cliche. All in all, the author tries so hard to make it work that it doesn't.

However, the most egregious error is the lack of understanding that the word mute means unable to speak, while the word moot means subject to debate, arguable, unresolved, as in a moot point. The author joins a long line of writers, most of whom are non-professionals, who insist that the point is mute -- and to me it's important that the point is moot -- especially if you make the (mute) point twice in the same chapter!

The book has gone to class with me, to a doctor's appointment, and to bed, but I've read the same opening five chapters three times now and finally have realized that I'm not going to make it to the next chapter, much less to the end. I have, however, had some solid sleep on the nights that I've tried to get past the exposition ... .

I'll hand the book off to son and let him have a go at it: although we have similar tastes, we also differ in our likes and dislikes, so this gift may be right up his alley. After all, he stayed for the end of the The Players, while I walked out after a meaningless hour spent trying to figure out why time, treasure and talent were spent to make the film. To this day, son insists that the ending made the film, but I need something along the way to engage both my intellect and my interest or the end comes a whole lot sooner for me than it does for either the book or the film!

Ta-Da!

I stood on a chair so you could see more of the completed rough draft paver patio, including the shrubbery that has been waiting for several weeks to be included in the finishing touches. It's overcast again, so I'm hoping it will rain and water in the new plants, as well as settle the pavers.

There are some high spots, and some low spots, and other pavers that are just right, so I'll be fine-tuning the project for several weeks to come as the sand settles beneath and around the pavers. I am going for a rustic, been there a while look, so am not overly concerned that it's perfect, but the low spots will collect water, which I don't want.

At the back of the patio, where I was standing in yesterday's photo, I put 2 bushes that will grow up and around the 2 big rocks. The smaller plants are more salvia, which I love because it grows well and has purple flowers that attract the birds and the bees. What's going to also happen at that end of the patio is the rocks outlining the oleanders along the fence are going to curve to match the patio planter and meet at the far right end to "finish" the look. At the front, the left corner of this photo, I'm putting in a step-down and a narrow path to the pavers -- then calling in the truck filled with crushed rock and topping the whole backyard with sand-saver!

When I get my Lowe's bonus gift cards ($300 total), I'm going to buy the chiminea and a chair to sit in front of it, something that will not blow away when the gale-f0rce winds come through the valley. I've looked for a cement round table and benches for the middle section, but I can find benches and no table. One of the salesmen told me that the tables are "too heavy," so they don't carry them at the big box stores. We have a lot of those places that sell pottery and cementware brought in from Mexico, so maybe I can find a set at one of those vendors.

The built-in barbeque will wait for Mr. He'll Do to enter my life and justify the time, the treasure, and the aggravation of adding that feature! (Which is another way of saying it ain't gonna happen!)

So, having met this goal in the grand scheme of things, I'm ready to drive to Canada as soon as the doggie door is secured.

I'm Still Looking for a Few Good Men ...

I was up and at 'em at 6:30 this morning, working while waiting for the guy I hired (and his friend) to show up and do some of the heavy lifting for me. I offered to pay what he thought was good money and he promised to be here between 8:15 and 8:45.

Yeah, right.

Another no show. Add him to the gardener who was stopping by on Friday to give me an estimate for the watering system I need in the new landscaping and I'm batting zero.

I'm half-way finished with phase 3, but ran out of steam about noon, when friends stopped by to say hidy. The good news is that Fat Matt moved the 2 huge rocks into place, one of the jobs for which I hired help. Where the cut-out is in the pavers, I'm planting some desert plants, which means 2 little areas along the back side of the paver patio. I already have vegetation behind where I'm standing to take the photo, and it'll stay there, outlined in native rocks.

One day, I'll have a chiminea on the right side of the patio (from where I'm standing), a seating area in the middle, and a water feature to the left of the huge rock in this view. And, when I'm rich and famous, I'll put a wooden shade structure over most of the area so it's truly useable (which it's not without shade during the summer).

The final stage of this part of the current landscaping project will be filling in from the paver patio to the rock outlined planting areas with crushed rock, which will look finished, reflect the front landscaping, and keep the sand outside.

One other noteworthy item from today is that Fat Matt says I can permanently attach the doggie door to the new slider -- and I'll get that done by the end of the week. Right now, Mia can use the doggie door during the day, but I cannot secure it at night, so I'm still getting up to let her out then back in.

Re: Gifting

The soaring high temps were set to ease off, so I planned to get back to phase 2 of the paver patio. However, last night the winds started up again, burying the 2 major cross-overs from my side of the tracks to the big box store, a required stop before any further work could be completed due to yet another "flit ter" on the wheelbarrow.

On the way to work today, I stopped by my friends' home in JT, where progress on doubling the size of the living space has been underway for about 6 months. The swim spa is so big, and a demo of the water jets showed me a current that could probably wipe out the strongest swimmer in short order. The garage is coming along nicely :) along with the other specialty rooms that tailor this home to my friends' comfort needs.

In the course of the conversation, I mentioned the continuing failure of the wheelbarrow wheel -- and got a "no puncture" tire replacement from Fat Matt's stash. The first phase of his renovation was a workshop to house all of the stuff in the old garage, which had to be torn down before the rest of the expansion project could break ground. During the relocation of stuff from the old garage to the new shop, Fat Matt found specific spots for specific items, which allowed him to have an ah-ha moment that led to my good fortune.

So, manana, I'm back outside (hopefully, the winds will die down) to install phase 2 of the paver patio before the predicted rains come in over the weekend. The clock is ticking and I'm not getting done what I want done before some other commitments have to take their place at the head of the to-do list.

chop-chop! busy-busy!

Paver Patio Stage One

Record-setting temps in the desert: 110 yesterday and at least 109 today. Therefore, those of us who know better stay inside and limit exposure to the fierce rays of the sun to little bits and pieces.

I was out at 6 am and pretty much wrapped up phase 1 of the paver patio by 9 am. It's still in the rough draft stage, but I'll go back for the detail work after I place the other 2 stages of the project--hopefully, one part tomorrow and the final part Wed morning (EARLY).

Stage 2 will go where the wheelbarrow is, stepped down 2 paver squares and extended by 2 squares on the near end. Stage 3 will do the same step down so the patio fills the space without being one big, boring rectangle. In the step downs, I may put benches or pots of plants so I don't need to use the actual 8x8 squares of pavers for creating interest. My goal is to echo what I did out front, without repeating the same look, so they tie together but are different.

The plan is to surround the paver patio with the same crushed rock that I used in the front landscaping project to keep the sand at bay, as well as the summer puncture weeds that plague woman and beast. I'm not sure when the crushed rock finish will be applied, but my goal is to set the pavers by this weekend.

From the corner of the paver facing the camera lense, I'm going to put a step-up walkway out of the same pavers that will connect the existing cement slab to the new paver patio. It's going to come at an angle, but I haven't figured out the exact details of that ... yet.

A hitch in the plan is yet another flat tire on the wheelbarrow, which is just too small to handle the loads of dirt I'm moving in it. I may try to borrow a larger barrow or give in and buy the larger size I should have bought in the first place -- but didn't. And, before I leave in July, I must have a watering system in place or I'll lose all the plants that have established themselves beautifully since planting a month ago. For this, I'm calling in a gardener I used before as he not only kept his appointment, but he gave me a price, honored the price, and did all the work he was hired to do -- not just anyone in the desert has the same ethics!

My big toe was comfortable in my gardening shoes, so it's okay. My wrist likes the wrist brace and isn't hurting nearly as much as it was all last week. The doctor called and told me I have a lot of arthritis in my left shoulder, neck, and wrist (no duh) and can get a cortisone shot to relieve the pain if I want it. I'll hold off until I'm finished moving pavers and then take the shot.

Hammer Your Thumb

Hey, I found an unexptected way to completely ignore the pain in my wrist: trip over a dog and gouge a quarter-sized hole out of my big toe! I must have hit the edge of the dinette set just right because the contact with my toe took out a big chunk of meat.

While hopping around the kitchen feeling the pain and spraying blood, my mind completely forgot that my wrist hurts, too.

Top Three "Bad Movie" Choices

Challenged to claim my top 3 choices for my favorite ‘bad’ movies (http://jmc-omniverse.blogspot.com/) turned my thoughts to those that I call comfort films, the ones that I watch when life seems to be heading in a direction I don’t want to go. They are smaltzy, romantic, funny, and turn out happily ever after, which is what I want in a movie: if it takes too much time, effort, and energy to engage in the story and plod through until the end, it doesn’t provide me with the comfort I am seeking.

Thus, the list.

First is Bounce, with Ben Afflect and Gwyneth Paltrow, a movie that answers the question, “What good could possibly come from an airline crash?” Ben Afflect portrays the stereotypical me-centered veneer people I despise: he gives up his seat to a fellow traveler so he can spend the night screwing a totally hot chick, but the guy who takes his ticket is then killed when the plane crashes. When push comes to shove, Ben blows off his role in the death. Of course, Ben redeems himself when he looks up the widow (Paltrow), who has 2 adorable little bratty boys and a rough time getting past the tragic death of her husband. She explains the title of the movie, Bounce, which has to do with knowing the role fate plays in life, sort of "that's the way the ball bounces." For what it’s worth, Afflect’s performance is mediocre and Paltrow’s barely a notch above average, but as a comfort film, it works for me.

Next, David Duchovny and Minnie Driver face their destiny in Return to Me, the story of a loving couple shattered by tragedy that provides a third party with a much-needed heart transplant. After a chance encounter at the zoo, enter David Duchovny into Minnie's life, the widower whose wife’s transplanted heart makes the point that when one life is gone, another begins. You see the ending coming long before the end of the film, which employs several side stories to add interest to what is pretty much a no-duh chick flick.

The third and final choice (in my top 3) is Purple Hearts, an old (1989) Viet Nam era war movie starring Cheryl Ladd and Ken Wahl. He’s a brash military doctor fighting in a war he doesn't support and in which he may, perhaps, die, but before he goes, he seriously needs to get laid. He picks Ladd, who’s a military nurse, not a whore, and turns down his gallant offer. However, he can’t forget her, nor can she forget him, even when a surprise artillery attack brings down the nurse’s barracks—and her body is identified as a casualty. His life becomes a ticking time bomb as the war swirls around him, but he makes it out and moves on with his life, accepting a job at a stateside hospital the nurse once told him would be her career choice if she survived the war. Bet you can't guess the ending!

None of these films would be on anyone's Top Ten list, but I hated Crash and Sideways, both of which were nominated for Academy Awards. What one likes in a film, another may not, and vice versa--which explains why reading a critic's review of a film should never determine whether one sees it or skips it!

Progress Report

The new living room window has been installed--and I love it! The tinted glass does make a difference; as the temp hovered about 105 today, the heat did not radiate off the glass as it did with the previous window. The slider is also in, but Mia's doggie door is out. I'm not sure how that will work for either of us as we are both used to her coming and going as she sees fit. I may be able to create a work-around, but the way it is configured, it's too tall for the opening by about an inch. And the screens were left off the delivery. They have been reordered and may arrive next Thursday, along with some kind of end cap for one of the sliders, and then we have to reschedule the installation people to come back and finish the job.

My wrist is still throbbing, but it's throbbing inside a brace that I am to wear 24/7 until the x-rays come back and/or the doctor can figure out what's wrong. So far, the best guess is that I "did something" when I hit the sharp edge of the car door, perhaps leading to a severely pinched nerve that is going into spasms with certain movements and just hurting like hell the rest of the time. X-rays should be back to the doctor by Tues-Wed, which means at least 5 more days of pain. It's recommended that I take 600-800 mg of ibuprofen every 8 hours to lessen the pain and help the swelling go down.

Regardless, tomorrow morning I'm starting to move the dirt into place for the paver patio. I have to get what's in the works finished, and I'm the only labor I have to do what needs to be done. I have asked several people for anyone who might be willing to work with me, even offering to pay hourly wages, but there simply aren't any takers. I have plants that must get into the ground or I'll have to throw them away and 200 12" square pavers to place. Perhaps using the wrist with the brace on will jar whatever is pinched back into place?

Then, I have to clean the pen! My house is SO dirty ... how dirty is it? It would take a crew a week to remove all traces of the landscaping project, the window replacement, and the constant high velocity winds that have pushed sand into every little nook and cranny of the interior of the house. I'll give it my best shot, but my priority right now is the landscaping, so it may get a lick and a promise cleaning.

Hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to bed I go so I can be up and at 'em early, before the sun comes up and starts baking the backyard. I have a paver patio to install!

Updating: I worked outside for a full 3 hours this morning before the sun became unbearable. My wrist feels so much better I cannot believe it! Perhaps whatever was pinched unstuck itself, but the pain is just a bit of throbbing and a feeling of being bruised inside, both of which are manageable. I was being flip when I suggested that using the arm/wrist may improve the condition, but it seems to have worked. Whatever!

A Day with Sunshine

Sometimes, it is the little things that make a difference in a day.

Last evening, a student handed me a surprise: the Utah quarter I’ve been looking for the past three months. She explained that I gave her, a fellow diabetic, a protein bar every week when she crashed at 4:30, so she’s been looking for the quarter and finally got one in her change that very day. She was as tickled to give it to me as I was to receive it! Three quarters left and my collection is complete.

A former student saw me at the library, where I was transferring some final exams I designed specifically for my DSPS students onto the lab computer. She ran up to me, gave me a huge bear hug, and thanked me profusely for being the best teacher she has ever had! I have seen her often during the past 2 years and have always asked how she’s doing with her English 3A requirement. Alas, she had dropped it twice, afraid to fail. I explained to her that we often learn more from failure than we ever do from simply replicating our past successes, and to stick with it for one semester as she may surprise herself with how well she’ll do.

Well she did: she passed the course with a 96%, an accomplishment she never gave herself credit for being capable of achieving. She told me how much my little pep talks did for her every time I encountered her on the campus—as well as my handy-dandy little trick for organizing the essay BEFORE starting to write it! Once she believed she was able to pass the course, she did—and she’ll be receiving her AA degree next week.

The man who was next door replacing the caved in septic tank before escrow closes on the house was outside when I started to leave. Noticing the HUGE pile of dirt he had excavated and knowing that I need “some” dirt to level the ground where my paver patio is going to go, I brazenly asked if he could spare a scoop for me to use in a backyard project. It would save me a lot of trips across the street with my wheelbarrow, so I figured nothing ventured, nothing gained. The excavation crew just left—and I have a big scoop of dirt in my yard to take to the patio in progress.

Finally, when I called the doctor about my severely swollen and throbbing wrist, there was an appointment available today, rather than 2 weeks down the road. That almost never happens.

So, even though over the long run it seems that life is bumpy, some days are smooth and straight. As the old saying goes, all sunshine makes the desert --- and I’m a slightly rainy person who enjoys that not all days are brilliantly sunny because then, when the sun does shine, the day stands out from all the rest.

Sinestra Ouchie

Somehow, I’ve injured my left wrist to the point that I literally cannot turn the page in a book! I know I pulled it when I was moving rocks several weeks ago, but it seemed to heal itself as I used a brace, soaked in hot water, and used heated moist wraps when it was really sore.

I think I reinjured it when I slammed my left shoulder into the top corner edge of the car door Sunday evening, after I returned from the Vegas trip. Pain ripped up and down my arm and hasn’t stopped. No matter which way I hold my wrist, or turn my wrist, or avoid using my left hand/arm, there is lots of hurtin’ pain. It’s been going into spasms which hurt like a mother! I have a bruise at the point of impact on my shoulder, which is tender and sore, but that isn’t the problem.

The problem is right at the wrist, where there’s a swollen blob at the base of my thumb and another swollen blob at my wrist. On the right wrist, those blobs are a raised vein—a one-piece, raised vein. On the left wrist, they are 2 disconnected swollen blobs. I remember watching Christian, the hot Latino dancer on Dancing with the Stars, show where his muscle ripped – and that is what my wrist looks like (sort of): two separate pieces where there used to be one.

Anyhoo, I’m going to the doctor Friday at 2 pm to see if he can figure this out. I’m sure it’ll be a round of x-rays, pain pills, and some sort of treatment protocol, but right now?

Just give me the drugs and take away the pain!

Great Concert!

Jersey Boys was well worth the drive to Las Vegas! The cast is excellent and the story well-told. However, for anyone in my generation, the music kicks ass and your hands just seem to clap in rhythm without any instruction or guidance! What amazed me was that the casting director could find (1) a male singer who fit the ethnicity profile and (2) who could sing the range required for the songs, as well as (3) was really, really short! Frankie Valli is only about 5 feet tall when he's on tippy-toes, and so was the actor who portrayed him in the musical.

The story is told from the perspective of the 4 male back-up singers, as well as Frankie, and the women in their lives. I thought the story of Bob Gaudio, who was rumored to be in the audience, was more interesting than Valli's story, and realized for the first time how crucial Gaudio's music was to Valli's career. There are no holds barred, so the audience sees the good, the bad, and the even worse.

No traffic to speak of, but the LV Strip was a teeming mass of humanity. The streets and sidewalks were jammed, and the average wait time for Mother's Day Brunch was about an hour. We ate at a "local" casino, one of the smaller ones that caters to the crowds on the outskirts of the LV metropolis: one trip to the Strip is usually enough for any given weekend. I deposited my $20 gambling budget into a slot machine and moved on to bigger and better things.

On the way back, my friend wanted to stop at the salt farm outside of Amboy, where there is also the remnant of a volcano that I climbed when I was 9 months' pregnant with my daughter. Imagine my surprise, after scaling the entire side of the blasted rock pile, to find that the other side has been worn away from erosion--and had we driven around, we could have walked into the heart of the volcano, rather than climbing it. At the time, I had thought to check out the visitor's center, but that became a family joke: the volcano is simply there, next to Route 66, and if you want to visit it, you drive across the rocky sand, park, get out, and walk. If you've ever been by Amboy, you know that there ain't nuttin' there!

During the salt mining process, the sand is flooded with water that then leeches the salt to the surface, where it is scooped up, processed, and sent to the marketplace. When there is an abundance of rain, the area can become quite a large lake as it's an old lake bed. I've known several times in the past when Amboy Road was closed--completely--due to flooding. One year, people enjoyed boating on the flats as the rain had created a lake at least 6-8 feet deep.

The water turns a brilliant turquoise, which is stunning, as the leeching process occurs. In the photos, one view shows that brilliance and the other shot shows what looks to me like a lunar landscape, with the salt, the mud, and a pile of debris from mining the salt that has been brought to the surface.

Years ago there were tours of the plant, but I don't know if the area is still open to that.

Popping My Happy Balloon

I've been up since before 5 am to do all the little chores I always do before I leave my house: make the bed, shower and get dressed, throw the last of the must-haves into the suitcase, fill 2 bowls of water for the dog and make sure she has an extra goodie this morning because she knows I'm leaving her until tomorrow. Because this is the desert, check the just in case water supply in the car.

This is the long-awaited Las Vegas weekend!

I've had tickets to Jersey Boys since they went on sale about 6 months ago, and I've been singing along with the sound track for about a year. I talked my friend into going with me because she has a friend who lives in Vegas; hence, no hotel! I have a can filled with quarters I've saved for the slot machines and I'm ready, ready, ready to DO THIS!

So why is it raining on my parade?

I just opened my daily horoscope and the first line reads: "Today is not a good travel day for you." Perhaps the only positive is that air travel should be avoided at all costs--and I'm driving.

I am going: if anything happens, it happens, and I'll deal with it if/when it happens.

Policing the Campus

Are the media reps who attend news conferences stupid or do they just ask truly stupid questions at news conferences?

There’s a major drug bust at SDSU involving dealers—drug traffickers—and the media reps ask about violating the privacy rights of the students; the comparison of drug usage today to the 1960s, when the college President was a college student; and the lack of prior notification to the faculty and staff regarding the undercover operation that led to the arrest of almost 100 criminals at SDSU.

As the President of the college stated, these individuals were engaged in overt criminal activity on the campus. The college has an obligation to the majority of the students who are not engaged in criminal behavior to ensure that the academically engaged adult students are free to pursue their educational goals without interference from the criminals, both students and off-campus visitors, who share their campus.

When it comes to rights, law-abiding citizen trumps criminal activity.

How about applauding the courage it takes for a college president not just to acknowledge that there is a problem, but also to be willing to do whatever it takes to deal with it? Keep in mind that there are approximately 30,000 students attending SDSU, and not quite 100 were arrested. It would have been easier to sweep this problem under the artificial turf, to keep it confined to the campus, but silence is permission. With this campus element publicly exposed to media glare, perhaps others who are tempted to set up shop at this and other college campuses will reconsider.

Too many young adults assume they can act with impunity because they are still in school. The drinking, the drug use, and the sexual promiscuity become the focus of college life, rather than academics and sanctioned activities. I was in college during the 1960s and sure, there were those who drank, who used, and who did it—but the majority of college students were there for the education, not the recreation. I believe that is still the case and want to assure that the student who wants an education can get it, while the student who wants drugs will have to go elsewhere.

Adult college students are not exempt from law enforcement: there is no get out of jail free card issued to criminals who coincidentally attend college classes! And it’s no longer either Daddy’s or Mommy’s prerogative to ride to the rescue: you do the crime—you do the time. You're not a "college kid," you're a criminal, and rather than matriculating with a college degree, the criminal earns a felony conviction and a prison sentence.

I say, "Job well-done, SDSU."

Made of Honor

Okay, so I'll admit that I joined the other dozen females who made the 10:45 am showing of Patrick Dempsey's newest movie--and I enjoyed it. It's not all comedy, and it is both funny and poignant (in places), but, perhaps more importantly, it stars McDreamy. He is a handsome man, but I do not like his constant 5 o'clock shadow: I just want him to shave already.

The witty repartee between the male characters is outstanding! The "guy thing" sells the movie, especially when they first see the physical attributes of the future groom revealed in a shower scene. They know he has a lot to offer to the bride, including a noble title, castles in Scotland, and the ability to dunk a basketball, but in that scene the guys ALL realize just how much ... more ... is in the bride's future.

The story is about friendship masquerading as nothing more, and when the female lead asks the question, "Why now," it's almost a cliche. In all the romantic comedies love comes after the girl/guy has found someone to take the place of the woman/man who won't commit. It's been done until it's overdone, but it still works in this film because I guess we all like to believe in happily ever after. And it does star McDreamy, who simply has to show up and do the same role time after time, in movie after movie, and cash his big paycheck.

It's a chick flick, there's no getting around it, and it's probably a chick flick that would become funnier with each glass of wine, but that's kinda why I go to the movies. I no longer think there's a McDreamy in my future, but sometimes, it's okay to go to a movie and pretend that he could be just around the corner. $6.50 for the early ticket and $5 for the snack pack? A small price to pay for suspending reality for just a little while.

Word Play #2

A friend who knows how much I enjoy this kind of word play sent the following:

Subject: MENSA definitions
The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners. Read them carefully. Each is an artificial word with only one letter altered to form a real word.

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted high on a viewable surface, very, very high.

6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

8. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

9. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's, like, a serious bummer, dude.

11. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day without caffeine.

12. Glibido: All talk and no action.

13. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

14. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

15. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

16. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

17. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Word Play

Quick: how many times can you use the word amazing in a two-minute TV interview? Increase word usage if you are the star of a newly-released movie. Under the age of 30? Double the count. Barely out of high school; not considering higher education? You can probably max out the scoring matrix.

That's amazing!

Kudos to the local supermarket that is encouraging families to organify their lives. Language is dynamic, so it's this kind of advertising creativity that sparks new words that much too quickly become part of our recognized lexicon.

Totally surreal (another one of my favorite widely-used expressions of the day)!

And congratulations to the morphing of two totally different words, racism and prejudice, so they can be used interchangeably and both be annointed with negative connotation. It was just a couple of years ago that prejudice could apply to a wide array of strong feelings for or against a person, place, idea, event, or thing, but now it's simply another way to say "white." People haven't positioned the word bigot for re-usage yet, but I can hardly wait to see how that plays in today's cultural environment.

Way to repurpose, people!

I grimace my way through sloppy slang expressions, such as "it don't matter," and I cringe with the familiar use of "Her/Him and I," but ignorant people who misuse words and then certify their misuse as the proper usage really grate on my nerves.

Prioritizing the News

Let's see if I have all the local events of the past 12 hours:

1. The horrendous winds have closed major thoroughfares again, knocking 18-wheelers onto their sides in the process
2. A wild fire is burning in the mountains above the valley
3. A power outage has about 2000 homes still in the dark
4. An earthquake banged its way into the evening hour, short, but a 4.2 located by the Salton Sea, which is already dying

God's leaving little clues that things are not going well with Mother Earth.

And, the foreclosures are at an all-time high; the servers aren't making the tips they made a year ago, so they can't meet their expenses; the affluent local contractors aren't all licensed, with 32 of them arrested in a sting this week; and the victim of a gang shooting climbed over the wall into a neighbor's yard to die. No, no one saw or heard anything.

Lip gloss appears to be causing lip cancer and everyday noises are far more dangerous to our hearing than originally thought. The medical industry is in a panic because as the number of senior citizens bulges into the system, the numbers of life-threatening diseases is also increasing.

The economy is slowing down, but wasn't it time for it to do so? People have become accustomed to spending way beyond their means without regard to how the bills would be paid if/when reality interfered with idealism. Half-million dollar homes purchased on a $50k salary, with a $50k vehicle or two in the drive, highlighted with an annual two-week resort vacation and a designer lifestyle added up to potential financial disaster for the family that feels entitled to live the way they want, rather than the way they can afford.

The LA cops are gearing up for violent May Day celebrations: they have completed recent retraining in appropriate crowd control. I wonder if anyone has retrained the crowds in appropriate crowd behavior, especially those protestors who wrap their faces with coverings so they cannot be identified ala Iran and Iraq.

But, let's go to the top of the priority list in news events: Paula Abdul became confused when the producers reorganized the elimination show and she thought that after one song, two had already been performed, so, using her notes, addressed both performances. Earth-shaking and totally noteworthy, which is why it's been the lead story on the morning news.

Oh, and by the way, it's flooding in Maine, displacing hundreds of residents, and a bus accident may have killed a student on the way to school this morning in Kentucky. But what about that Paula Abdul? What is up with that?