GRRRRilla in the Garage

I am going through life with my teeth clenched, holding back an explosion of comments that want to erupt, but would probably be inappropriate, at best.

For instance, the PRESIDENT actually said that the local cops acted "stupidly" by intervening in what appeared to neighbors as a B & E because the person acting as if he were burglarizing the home was the BLACK homeowner, a fact that was unknown when the 9-1-1 call was made by a concerned neighbor? Ya know, Mr. President, the cops have a totally thankless job in many respects, especially the part where they walk into suspicious circumstances that could cost someone a life: the cop OR the homeowner. A President who comments on an incident without knowing all the facts loses credibility while demonstrating that racism is alive and well in the black community. And sharing a beer is going to resolve this issue how? There are no do-overs.

Employees at office supply stores who don't agree with a consumer's choice should keep quiet, rather than "putting it out there" in front of the consumer. I have a Palm Pilot and I misplaced the power cord, so I went looking for a replacement: K-Mart, Wal-Mart, Office Depot, Staples, Radio Shack, Target, the independent phone kiosks. All I need to know is whether the part is available; what I don't need to know is that (little giggle) my PDA is a "dinosaur" and I ought to "get with the times" and replace it with a product conveniently sold at the business. If I wanted a different product, I would have asked for it: what I need is a power cord, not your smart-ass attitude about my tech preferences.

I'm not only paying my mortgage, but I'm 3 months ahead on it. ALWAYS: I don't pay late fees. I borrowed the money, so I will repay it: all of it. I read the papers, understood my obligation, and signed of my own free will. My mortgage company continues to call me re: forestalling foreclosure (I'm AHEAD, not behind, in my mortgage), refinancing at a better interest rate (uh, no, mine is already very reasonable), or taking out a line of credit for these trying times (I have a savings account: ever heard of that?). I did receive notification from the county assessor that my assessed value has fallen again, another $10k, the same amount it declined last year, which helps my tax base, but pretty soon, my house is going to be worth less than an empty dirt parcel! By lowering my assessment, I pay less in property taxes, which diminishes the tax revenue for my community, which means more budget cuts. No matter how you look at it, this is a lose-lose.

Why does anyone in government think that I am so terminally stupid that I'd actually turn in my clunker for $4500 to put toward the purchase of a new car? A cheap car is going to cost me $20k; who's going to pay the other $15k? I drive a 2001 Toyota Camry with under 100,000 miles on the odometer, and I have spent a fortune keeping it in excellent condition, doing all of the required maintenance when required. The reason I invest in car maintenance is so I can drive the car well past the loan pay-off date! Keeping a car does not make it a clunker, and I'm offended at the assumption that those of us who do not trade in our cars every 3 years are somehow damaging the environment and stealing carbon footprints from those who always have the newest/most expensive cars in their driveways and monthly payments hanging over their heads. For crying out loud: I replaced all of my old-fashioned light bulbs with the CFLs, allegedly the same as taking 40,000 cars off the road: let me drive my car!

Who really cares if Jon has replaced one Kate with another Kate? The replacement is younger, sexier, more malleable than Kate, the mother of 8 children, comes across on TV, but without all the cosmetic enhancements, Jon ain't all that. The newer, younger, sexier Kate will move on, Jon, because trust me, she can do far better than a somewhat chubby older guy with 8 children and a hair transplant. Clock's ticking on her 15 minutes of fame ... and yours.

Ditto The Bachelorette: does anyone actually believe that a lifelong love can be found on a TV show? We used to call girls who slept with numerous guys in the quest to find the right one a slut, but today? She's just putting herself out there! The old shame on me adage applies here: perhaps it's telling that she picked the guy who left the show, then came back when he realized that he'd made a huge mistake and actually begged her to pick me! Uh, guy? The mistake was auditioning in the first place, compounded by showing up on the set, compounded by actually participating in the whole silly charade, compounded by thinking that any woman who would go on a reality TV show to find her one true love is ... real. Believe me, YOU'VE ALL BEEN LOOKING FOR LOVE IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES!!

Why is the Jackson family surprised that Michael died from a drug overdose? Was this not pretty much a foregone conclusion based on the fact that he wasn't just using drugs, but severely abusing them? If there is any story left in this saga, it is Jackson surviving as long as he did. Why does the Jackson family feel they have to blame his death on anyone else? Didn't ALL of them, both individually and collectively, pretty much wash their hands of him and his life? His father is disgusting, appearing on TV in his jaunty hat and pretending that he has any contact with anyone remotely related to him! He's lived apart from the rest of the Jacksons for a full decade: he only showed up at the funeral for appearances sake. Can we please, please just move on?

For all the $$$ I've thrown at watering systems, you'd think they would work regardless of the weather. My plants in the front yard are parched, so I'm back to hand watering. Yes, the new timer works just great -- but I'm not sure what it's timing as there isn't water coming out of all the little sprinkler heads by all the various plants. It has to be telling that I'm killing cactus!!!

I need to rid the house of the huge copy machine that I replaced with an all-in-one printer combo a year ago because it cost me $360 annually for a maintenance agreement on the copy machine, a sum that purchased a pretty great all-in-one. I would be rid of it, but I don't know what to do with it. I've contacted places that might be able to use it, but they don't want it. I can't just throw it away as it works, and if I donate it to a thrift shop, who's going to want it? If I can't afford it, I doubt that thrift shoppers can. Ditto about 8 different cameras still in a drawer waiting for a decision on what to do with them.

There are so many things that I want to be doing, but I'm not doing them. I have a stack of handwork in process, but it's too hot to work on any of those projects. I want to cook and have a pile of recipes all picked out, but my weight has become such an issue that I don't want to put food into my mouth. I didn't like my hair short, but I have no tolerance for growing it out as it's in that yucky ugly not short/not long stage and looks pretty darned bad. Feels good, though, as I'm using Biolage shampoo, but I have to "do something" before I return to work in a few weeks.

Bottom line is that I've spent some long, hot hours in the newly-cleaned garage, picking up where my guys left off so I can finally finish that project. They left boxes for me to make decisions about, but I still don't know what the hell to do with all this crap! There is stuff I don't want to throw away, but why am I keeping it? And the photo albums: good grief, when I put all those pictures into all those plastic page protectors, I never went far enough down the "in the future" road to know that one day I'd be looking at them and wondering what the hell to do with them.

I'm a cranky gorilla in the garage and it isn't going to get better.