Dirty Little Secrets

Men seem to be fiercely protective of their junk, warning strangers not to touch their private parts or suffer the consequences. Allegedly, there is some degree of apprehension even when sharing their junk with a sexual partner because one cannot know how the other half of the sex act is going to react to the pubic unveiling. A recent radio discussion involved ascertaining whether women are turned on -- or off -- by a man's junk, with the results of a survey indicating that a man's sexual equipment may be functional, but not necessarily appealing to look at from the woman's perspective. As a matter of fact, the discussion concluded that being too up close and personal can be a total turn-off for many women. Perhaps men forget that when they call their private parts "junk," that's the way the rest of us are going to react to it, too.

So, why on earth do men take photos of their junk? Do THEY not know what it looks like, so they need to see it from another perspective? How about using a mirror? Or, if the man uses a digital camera, DELETE it after the viewing is finished!! For crying out loud, why would anyone take an intimate photo of their private parts -- and then send it to the rest of the world for critique? Do men really think that the world won't titter in embarassment and/or laugh at their shortcomings?

Is it a lack of self-confidence or an overblown ego that drives this sort of behavior, or, in the latest case, is it the result of too many years of "weiner" jokes that convinces the big brain that posting intimate photos of one's genitalia is a good idea?

I used to joke about how lax the media was becoming about personal products when tampon commercials first started airing, predicting that one day we'd see a comparison of used tampons to demonstrate superior absorbancy. Little did I realize how close to that truth TV advertising would come! There are no current boundaries, so rather than keeping their private parts private, women flaunt their bodies while dressed in scanty lingerie from Victoria's Secret, and men flaunt a crotch bulge while showing off a new line of men's underwear. It crosses a line between public and personal business, and there are some things that don't need a public airing, including a man's junk.

Young people today brag about their sexuality when they are too young to understand that nude photos, as well as sex tapes (no matter how "tasteful" anyone claims they are), remain with them for a lifetime, just like a tattoo. What seems like a good idea in the moment can become one of those skeletons in the closet that no one wants to share publicly down the road. Today, it's called a sex tape, but not so long ago it was called porn. I listened while Paris Hilton and her mom shared the "shame" of Paris's pornographic sex tape on Piers' talk show, but neither of them went to the heart of the issue: why was the tape made in the first place? What is morally missing in Paris that the only way she could make her mark on the world was to film herself engaging in sexual activity with her then-boyfriend and then sharing it with the world? How many other girls copied her behavior when they saw how it thrust Paris into the social limelight and made her a household name?

What link is missing in a politician's brain that he thinks he can photograph his private parts, send them into the electronic ether to be viewed and commented on by strangers, and walk away with no harm/no foul? Do politicians think this kind of behavior is not going to be questioned by the people who elected them? Their job is to represent the electorate politically, not to stroke their own ego by showing off their junk to strangers!

A public figure who engages in such reckless behavior needs to resign immediately: if you do the crime, you do the time -- and it is a crime to engage in pornography. Taking pictures of your junk and sending them to strangers is not "just social networking," and to compound the error in judgment, as well as the criminality of the act, by denying it when YOU know what you did is inexcuseable. As the old saying goes, "Fool's names, like fool's faces, always turn up in public places," and this country does not need any more fools in public places.