You Don't Wear High Heels to Coachella!

My phone rang at 6 am today, a time that indicates "oh-oh" more often than not. This morning, however, it was a friend calling to ask me to join her for b'fast. She knows that I walk the dogs at 6 am, then return home, eat b'fast, take a shower, and get on with my day. More often than not, she calls as I'm eating b'fast, so this morning, she decided to beat me to it (which meant that I walked the dogs at 7:30 am, almost too late in the morning during this hot-hot spell) and called at what is often known as "zero dark thirty."

It was one of those mornings where the banter was back and forth, each of us exchanging stories and comments. She shared about a mutual acquaintance breaking up with his long-time girlfriend because, believe it or not, she wore high heels to Coachella. That hit me funny, but resonated deeply because I am one of those people who goes along to get along as much/often as I can, but one day, one little thing sets me off, and it's over. Just as the b-friend should have been communicating better on a daily basis, rather than letting the fact that his g-friend wearing high heels to an outdoor concert venue was his reason for ending the relationship, I need to continue to work on my daily communication with others, rather than fuming in silence and then exploding over ... basically nothing.

I have been using my "Loser's Laments" strategy for articulating more calmly, more clearly, and more accurately what the issue is and how it needs to be handled. So far, that's going better than just venting and walking away, which always meant that I had to come back to whatever sooner or later, so may as well deal with it now and be done. I'm keeping the focus on the issue, rather than on how I feel about the issue, and coming up with my solution plan before I bring up the issue. I'm not wearing shoes to Coachella to see if anyone notices and comments on them as I realize that the shoes are not the right footwear before I dig them out of the closet.

From this day forward, it's going to be "wearing high heels to Coachella" that explains why it's the grain of sand in my shoe that wears me out, not the many miles I have left to walk before I arrive at my destination.