All Lives Matter

The first month of this new lifestyle took some getting used to, but I made adjustments and did just fine.  But now, it's three months later and I'm over it, getting antsy and crabby, and ready to have this whole COVID thing go away.  We've seen the protests, the rioting, the looting and it breaks my heart to think of all the store owners who now have lost everything, who have nothing to go back to to get their lives back.  They spent  those months of just waiting, scrimping and saving and salvaging whatever they could out of the situation -- and now have lost everything that could have been a way up and out of the morass created by COVID because the looting and burning of businesses have taken that away.  There is no picking up the pieces when you were  just making ends meet.  Insurance will only cover so much of the losses -- and where are the records to show what was lost in the looting?  Well, they burned up as well.

It breaks my heart to be in this world right now, to listen to people demand "justice" when their way of getting it is to destroy what has been part of this country for centuries.  Beautiful monuments and statues have been defaced, torn down, torn apart.  Cemeteries honoring the lives of those who died for this country have been  desecrated.  Cities that have fought to improve their appearance and become the heart of a people's prosperity have been looted and then destroyed.  And hoodlums who are looting, stealing, vandalizing and destroying are shoving signs at the newscasters proclaiming that "Black lives matter."  If they truly mattered, those very people who want so much would never have destroyed what they did have to get it.

I was told, as a child and young adult, that I would get what I worked for:  no one was going to give me a free ride, so I'd better prepare myself to work hard in order to have a better life.  First step in the process was an education -- and one size fit all.  There were no special circumstances, no getting off the hook in the hard classes, no free ride.  If you wanted an education, you had to work hard for it, but there came a sense of pride when you completed the requirements and got to graduate.  Sure, only a few could graduate at the top of their class, and the rest of us just sort of fell into line behind them, but we all had to earn it whether with high grades and honors or barely squeeking by.  Some never made it, but almost everyone tried--and a lot succeeded beyond their expectations.  Some went onto college, most often not at one of the prestigious colleges, but, rather, at a community college or a nearby 4-year program they commuted to attend--and others?  Well, often they turned to the military for basic training in a skill that they could practice for an enlistment before getting out of the service and using those skills in their communities.  Some, the lucky ones who thrived in the military environment, made it a career and retired after 20 years with a nice little pension, still young enough to take on a second career and have a good life with their families and friends.

No one gave it to another.  It was there for the taking, but it was all on the one who wanted what life had to offer.  Hard work never hurt anyone, but sloughing off, giving up?  that hurts everyone.  If any lives matter, they all matter regardless of the size, the shape, or the color--but no one owes anyone else anything when it comes to making it through life.  We all have to make our own way, and some do better than others and some do worse, but most of us?  We find a place for ourselves and make it the best it can be.  If we want more, we try to earn more, often by going back for some additional schooling and/or training.  Sometimes, we have to change jobs because we cannot be as successful in a job as we thought we could when we chose it.  Sometimes, we have to take what we can get and be glad we got it because others tried and failed, but we made it.   Barely, but we made it and had a sense of accomplishment that gave us pride in who we are and what we can do.

I'm sick about where we are today, what we have become, who we think we are, and how far we have sunk from the ideals that were the basic precepts of life when I was "coming up," as they say.  Everything I was taught to believe has been tossed into the ruins of a looted building to burn and destroy what this nation stands for.  No one owes you anything; if you want it, go out and learn and then earn.  Work your ass off and do the best possible job of which you are capable, and earn the fruits of your labor.  You won't always get rich from paychecks, but you'll have your self-worth, your self-esteem, your pride in yourself for a job well-done personally and professionally.

Stop proclaiming that you are owed something because ... fill in the blanks.  No one owes anyone anything, but we all have the right to earn what we want or need to make our lives matter.  If you want your life to matter, make it matter first to yourself, and then to others.  Stop burning and looting and destroying and start by rebuilding your own life into the life you need it to be.  Focus on improving yourself and stop pitying yourself for what you don't have, but want.  If you truly want it, if you need it, then go out and work for it.  You'll be proud of yourself and your accomplishments and be well-respected by your fellow citizens.  All lives matter, regardless of color or creed.

I Hereby Resolve

Okay, so here’s the deal:  I’m fat and I don’t seem to be able to lose weight like I used to do with little effort.  I’ve tried eating only 3 times a day, and I’ve been careful what I eat (although I admit to a fondness for sweets at 10 o’clock each day with my mid-morning coffee), cutting back to about half of what I was eating.  I’m not a stress eater, nor am I a snacker of the salty-fat variety, but I have really bad food habits as I live alone and don’t like the effort involved in fixing a good (healthy) meal for myself three times a day.  I’ve tried protein shakes, healthy-eating diets, upped my exercise, and generally given it the old college try, but my belly is huge and my face is big and round where it used to be lean and narrow.

So, it’s time to do something again and, after thinking about it far too much, I decided to try something I’ve never tried before and see if something new and different works for me this time. I did some searching of the internet and ran across a Dr. “Rans” (phonetic spelling of his name as I don’t recall seeing it written anywhere). I listened to his lecture about “activating the AMPK gene and losing weight.” Didn’t sound any worse than other options I researched so I took a few notes and got this:

To lose weight, one must attack fat on a cellular level, particularly in deep belly fat situations. AMPK is the “master switch” of the body, so if one activates the AMPK gene, s/he can lose weight and live longer. Everyone has the number of fat cells they had from conception, so there’s no gaining/losing weight based on the amount of food one consumes, but on the number of calories and how they are stored.  Fat cells can expand and contract, and if cells are overfed, they lose function. AMPK is the “master switch” of the body, so if one activates the AMPK gene, one can lose weight and live longer.

All right, that’s a brief overview.  I listened for the full 45 minutes and the whole presentation made sense to me, so I decided I’m going to try this approach this year as what I’ve done in the past hasn’t seemed to help. According to this information, exercise improves health, reduces disease, and helps memory, but doesn’t help one lose weight.  I want to continue with my exercise routine, and may even up that a bit, but I also want to lose weight, and that happens on a cellular level. Hence the AMPK.

There are three keystones to this method, focusing on naturally occurring compounds that are available: berberine, which is the roots of plants and usually used as a diabetes treatment; gynostemona, an extract from plants that is an AMPK stimulator; and quercetin, which activates AMPK and reduces general sickness. This can’t be any worse than any of the other dozens of products and methods I’ve used to try to control my weight, so I’ll give it a go and see what happens.  I ordered enough for several months, and once I’ve put my money into something, I see it through.

My ultimate goal: not to stand on a scale and see that I’m down a pound or two, but to stand up tall and straight and be able to look down and see my shoes!  Surely that isn’t asking too much … .

A Week of Deliciousness

Our first box of Blue Apron meals is finished, with great success and enthusiasm for not only the finished products, but also the cooking process. Each recipe includes step-by-step instructions, so if you are a novice cook, just follow the “rules.”

Our first dinner was Katsu-Style Catfish, with a generous portion of cat fish fillets, jasmine rice, and red cabbage for each of us. The directions were easy to follow and put the cooking tasks into the order of longest to shortest cooking time, so everything is done at the same time. Our second meal, spice-rubbed pork, was delicious! I’m not a big bean eater, so I approached the black beans with a bit of skepticism, but they were very good and one of Y’s favorites for the week. The third meal was chicken meatballs & fregola sarda, which tasted better than it sounds. Y was skeptical that we could turn the small amount of chicken meat into the recommended 10 meatballs, but I told him to follow the rules (which is what southern cooks call a recipe) and do the tasks in order and as directed and then we would judge the results. End result? He’s delighted that there are left-overs for his lunch today.

We’re excited to anticipate our next box. We enjoyed cooking together, as well as the end result. The most labor-intensive meal was, surprisingly, the chicken meatball dinner, but that was more because the pearl pasta had to come to a boil and then cook for 15 minutes. We ended up waiting for it to finish so we could move on to the next step in the directions. That menu also came with fresh kale, which we seasoned and wilted into the red sauce, and it was so good. The seasonings were perfect and made for quite the tasty veggie, one which we will make again using store-bought ingredients.

Yep, we can’t wait for this coming week’s box of goodies. Y is especially pleased that we made dishes that all tasted like restaurant meals, rather than something far too over the top for us to enjoy. We’re doing this for a month to see if it works for us, but based on week one’s offerings, we’re all-in.

I give Blue Apron an A+ and an enthusiastic "hell ya!"

It's All About the Music

Without question, my favorite TV singing show is The Sing-Off, featuring a capella singing groups with a range of ages and abilities. The Sing Off was awesome the first time around, but it didn’t make it back on-air last year. This year, it’s back in a slightly different format, including fewer performance groups and a quicker pace.The basic premise is ten singing groups, ranging from 5 performers to 20 or so, who prepare presentations within a musical context, such as Party Anthems. Each froup performs, is critiqued by judges who actually have professional singing careers, and the bottom two choirs at the end of each episode duel for the save that brings one of the bottom two groups back for the next round in the competition. Every group is good, but there is always another group who is better – and that head-to-head competition elevates the bottom groups to bring their A game if they expect to be saved.

The pros on the show include Nick Lachey, host, and judges Ben Fols, Shawn Stockman, and this year’s new addition, Jewel. Because all of the pros are professional musicians, they are tuned into the talent, rather than focused on the cute performances that often mask weak singing. For instance, Justin Beiber would be a good member of a choir, but he doesn’t have a solo voice; hence, all the electronic enhancement and distractions on the stage to keep the focus off his basic weakness: his voice. On the other end of the spectrum, a Whitney Houston voice needs a large choir to help her blend as her powerful voice demands singing solos, and would over-power a small a capella group. In an a capella group, every voice has to be a “best” voice because each member has to carry his/her own weight and not drag down the over-all performance of the choir.

The competitors need to have strong bass vocalists to anchor the bottom range of the songs, the bass provided solely with vocals because no instrumentation augments the singing. Additionally, there is a “beat box” performer who sets the tempo and keeps the performance moving to … the beat … without having a drummer on stage. There also have to be enough members of the group to fill in both the mid-range and the high end, and all of it has to be cohesive, as well as technically perfect to win the contest. Any one performer dragging the tempo, or flatting a high note, or rushing the bridge can justify being in the bottom two and headed back home for the holidays.

This years’ groups include a high school team, a typical street corner group of singers from days gone by, a niche performance group of Filipino male singers, and a large group of male performers who go by the name of AcoustiCats. Sprinkled into the mix are groups that include both male and female performers who blend their voices in song and accentuate the pieces with choreography that keeps the eyes entertained while the ears listen to the music. Too much choreography distracts from the music, and poorly performed music stands out with nothing else on stage to mask a singing issue.

I’m happy to have The Sing Off back this year and hope that it comes back every holiday to delight those of us who enjoy real singing, rather than electronically enhanced lip-syncing.

Inn the Holiday Mood

The Mission Inn in Riverside is spectacular any time of the year, but especially so at Christmas as every available surface is decorated and often lit with holiday lights. There are many shops that comprise the village atmosphere created both within and surrounding the Inn, which has become the heart of the city of Riverside. The historic Inn has seen both good times and bad, including almost a decade of non-use that precluded purchase by a new corporation, the Historic Mission Inn Corporation, which not only purchased the Inn, but renovated it beyond its original splendor.

This year, I invited both Yucheng and my dear friend, Nadine, to be my guests on a day trip to the Inn. We were all impressed with both the architecture and the historical aspects of the Inn, including original wood benches, artwork, and religious icons, as well as a museum feel to the locale. The Inn is decked out for Christmas, so there were decorations and lights from one end to the another, both inside and out, decorations that come to light with the Festival of the Lights, an evening event that draws thousands of visitors to the Inn. We, however, enjoyed a daytime visit, but still were able to enjoy the many different indoor displays.

We stopped just outside one entrance to the Inn to enjoy a cupcake from Casey’s Cupcakes, a recent winner on the TV show Cupcake Wars. All three of us enjoyed our cupcakes, but my loyal friends assured me that MY cupcakes are better. I will admit that the lemon cake I had was dry, but the buttercream icing was delicious. We also visited various shops in the mall outside the Inn, including one that featured the most unusual holiday tree I’ve seen – and loved! Nadine found the perfect holiday gift, a Santa on Skis, for her son who anticipates the annual holiday season solely for the skiing!

We enjoyed lunch at the American cuisine restaurant, which was filled to capacity the entire time we were at the Inn. The food was delicious, and sitting outside to enjoy lunch in late December was a real treat: beautiful weather and surrounded with Christmas decorations and music. Although Riverside may not be considered as a major tourist destination, the Mission Inn is certainly a must-stop while in the city, and most especially during the Christmas holidays.

Sticks and Stones

Cinnamon is growing litterly by leaps and bounds. She has learned how to bark and play both tag and keep-away with Daisy; unfortunately, that madhouse occurs as often in the living room as it does outside. Daisy’s nose has been out of joint since Cinnamon came to live with us, but she’s slowly making her peace with the littlest dog in our house.

Mia? She’s never had her own litter, but she’s a “mama” when it comes to other dogs. Mia is the one who sniffs the appropriate places on Cinnamon to determine whether we need another trip to the potty place, and Mia is right more often than she’s wrong.

Several weeks ago, I had a neighbor earn some spending money by hauling wheelbarrows full of dirt into the area along the fence that Mia digs up. He brought in 10 loads, so I thought we were set; however, Mia has managed to dig two large craters into which she folds herself when the nights are just warm enough, without being too hot, and therein she sleeps the night away. Cinnamon has discovered that there are small rocks throughout the sandy area, rocks that she roots out first with her nose and then with her ferocious digging (note rock in photo). She tosses sand this way and that until the rock is showing, and then she digs it out and brings it into the house, where she plays her own form of ceramic tile soccer. I have to keep picking up the rocks and taking them back outside because that is a slip and fall waiting to happen!

Cinnamon’s other favorite chew toy is a stick, but I try to be quick to take them away as she hauls them into the house. Sticks shred, and her digestive system is not ready to handle wood shards. Yes, I have indeed invested a small fortune in an assortment of chew toys, but just as the younger child likes the empty boxes and wrapping paper at Christmas, rather than the toy inside the wrapped box, Cinnamon likes her sticks and stones.

I’m glad I brought Cinnamon home, even though the timing is not the greatest. I’ve made arrangements for her to stay with my housekeeper while Yucheng attends classes and I'm away from the house. It’ll be a bit of back and forth, but it’s important that Cinnamon knows this is her home, even when I’m not here to play with her and cuddle. Of course, she's still small enough that I could stash her in my shoulder bag and take her with me, but that's not a good idea with the full house already planned for the wedding!

Puppy Love

Yes, I already have 2 dogs, both of whom I brought home with me already imprinted with someone else's early nurturing. I love my dogs, but Mia is having physical issues and I may have her put to sleep ... sooner, rather than later. Daisy is very set in her ways, and it's Daisy's way or the highway. She is not thrilled that I brought home a new puppy, but Mia and I are enjoying her very much. Today, as a matter of fact, Cinnamon crawled up from my belly to my left arm, which was tucked against the couch, scooted around until she was comfy, and didn't move for an entire hour.

Cinnamon is Applehead Chihuahua and Pomerainian, and her mother and daddy are both about 2/3 Daisy's size. Her fur (refer to photo) is a soft, buttery yellow with one cinnamon dot; hence, her new name: Cinnamon. Her nails need clipping, and I must make a vet appt for her shots, as well as an appt to be "fixed."

As far as I can tell, she's smart, already playing with the crazy blue ball and quickly learning how to come in/go out the doggy door. Of course, the first time she made it through one side, she curled up on the little base between the inner and outer flaps, then went soundly to sleep. Imagine Daisy's surprise when she came bounding through the doggie door! When it's time to go to the potty place, both Mia and Daisy walk her over to the shaded sandy area they have all used until they were big enough to make it out to the dog run. It's cute to see the little troop of dogs heading out, single file, Mia in the lead, Daisy in the middle, and Cinnamon running furiously to keep up with the much larger dogs, on their way to pee.

Cinnamon can bark, at first tentatively, but when it's at Daisy, her bark becomes louder. A really obnoxious yapping dog is sometimes as effective at keeping strangers outside the fence as the ferocious bark of a bigger dog. My goal: less large poop piles to clean up every week.

I am by nature a nurturer, and right now I need something to nurture. I've killed almost all of my houseplants in the past 6 weeks, either by over-watering or under-watering, I'm not sure which. Instead of replacing them, I'm going to nurture the dog and fervently pray that the dog fairs better than the plants.

Blankie Wars

Daisy's favorite evening activity is cuddling with me on the couch while I watch TV and knit/crochet. She has her favorite blankie and can hardly wait for me to grab it before she leaps over the couch to be tucked in just the way she likes. This blankie is her favorite because the holes in the crochet are just the right size for her nose to sniff through, as well as her eyes to spy what's on the TV in case a dog appears on the screen and Daisy has to rescue us from that potential danger.

Mia, on the other hand, is not particularly thrilled that Daisy gets the special blankie while she has to stretch out on a mere towel that barely covers the couch she's NOT allowed to sleep on. (Well, that's the theory, but Mia does her own thing.)

Last night, however, after spending a couple of days on the coast, I was tired and forgot to fold the special blankie and store it off the couch. When I came out to the living room this morning, Mia had commandeered the blankie and it was evident from her fierce scowl that she is neither giving it up nor sharing it. Daisy, observing from her perch on top of the couch cushions, seems content to wait Mia out because she knows I'll pick up the blankie and not bring it out until it's time to cuddle after dinner.

Oh, well. Time to do some laundry, including dirty dog blankies and couch cushion covers.

Brownie Points

Brownie is still with us, at least until his own mommie comes back from her vacation. Brownie is the daughter’s dog, but he’s spent the summer with the mom, who definitely does not like dogs in any way, shape or form. She tolerates Brownie, but she wants as little to do with him as possible.

Because I am one of those annoying people who butts in where I am not needed, I volunteered to take Brownie during the day so he could socialize with my dogs and play in our big yard, rather than spend the days locked in a bathroom until someone comes home. Hearing his barking and whining during the day, as then continue all night long, got on my nerves big-time: I’d rather have him quiet and content at my house than whining and barking at his.

Brownie is tiny, about 5 pounds, but he has an attitude bigger than all outdoors. Mia tolerates him, but accepts him, Daisy is not so happy to be sharing the spotlight with him (and refused to be in the picture), and I am adjusting to the constant tug-o-war between them. Brownie has taken over my bed, much to Daisy’s dismay, and he is not willing to share. He climbs all over Mia, settling down so close to her that she cannot move away. Mia acts annoyed, Daisy growls, and Brownie is oblivious. But, he’s happy. He follows the girls as they go in and out, he waits his turn for a little treat, he curls up either on my lap or along my arm, depending on where I’m sitting and what I’m doing. He runs outside like he’s on fire when he hears a noise in the neighborhood, then comes back inside to let me know he’s assessed the situation and we are all secure and safe, just as my other 2 dogs have trained him to do.

When it comes to the morning walk, Brownie is obviously in charge. As the smallest of the three, he takes point, barks warnings about all the other dogs in the neighborhood, wants to select the corners at which we turn, and stops at new bushes along our route that my dogs have not already vetted. Brownie struts, Daisy trots, and Mia lumbers alongside me, shooting me that sideways look that says, “Really? You are letting him be the walk director?”

We are going for shorter walks because I’m not sure Brownie can do our full 45 minutes each morning, and neither of my girls is happy with that as they barely get the kinks out before we are pulling back into the driveway. My girls want to walk through the entire neighborhood. They need to know who’s here, who doesn’t belong, and where the potential problems lurk, and that takes serious commitment every morning, not a little Sunday stroll. If Brownie stays around, I'm going to have to find out whether he can actually do "our" walk, rather than forcing us to do his walk each morning.

Brownie’s mommie will be home Saturday, and I know he will be glad to see her, but school is back in session, so she’ll be gone from 7 am until about 6 pm because she’s working as an aide with her mother at an after-school program. So, even though Brownie’s owners will be back home together, he’ll still spend most of his existence locked in the bathroom. I don’t want another dog, but it breaks my heart to see such a sweet little guy spend his life in isolation for a crime he didn’t commit.

We’ll see what happens after the weekend, but I suspect that Brownie is going to be at least a temporary member of our family even after his owner comes home this weekend. She’ll play with him over the weekend, but I’m betting dollars to donuts that she’s going to ask me to keep him while she’s at school during the week. Guess I’d better come up with an answer for that.

Along the SoCal Coast

Yesterday, I drove to LaJolla to see my friend for lunch and do a few quick errands. Although it seems like a somewhat long drive just for lunch, she lives across the street from the beach ... across the street!! The ocean is one of my favorite places to visit, a place where I have always found peace, and she is one of my dearest friends. It's a win-win.

This is a snippet showing the small breakwater that provides a sheltered swimming area, now overly-populated by seals (the black forms on the sand).



An on-going controversy about allowing the people back into the sheltered swimming area seems to be coming to a head as the courts have ruled that the closed-off beach can be reopened to humans. Opponents fought the good fight, but the open beach advocates won the battle, just as the off-shore oil drilling advocates won their battle -- and we all know how well that's turned out.

The seals have fouled the little cove formed by the breakwater, so I'm not sure who would want to swim there, but perhaps there is a point I'm missing made by people whose joy in life is making meaningless points. Will the re-integration of humans into this tiny spot of ocean force the seals to relocate? Perhaps that is the goal of the humans' actions, but the seals are a huge tourist attraction, evidenced by the several buses that dropped off passengers during the short time I was there.

Sometimes, we do cut off our noses to spite our faces.

LA Fried Turkey

That's Lou-see-ana fried turkey and man, was it good! I was invited to a friend's home for Thanksgiving dinner and I've never seen so much food for so few people. A big turkey, a big ham, two kinds of stuffing, three vegetable dishes, mashed potatoes and the best pecan praline sweet potatoes I've ever tasted, a corn casserole that was incredibly good, hot rolls, gravy. Well, I'm sure I've left something off the list, but whatever that dish was has to be as good as all the others.

Then came the desserts -- and the kitchen counter was again covered from one end to the other. I didn't even start because that counter was a medical no-no! There is enough food left over to have a crowd to eat leftovers and still have some for the 'fridge.

The host deep fried another turkey for me, which I shared 3 ways: one breast and the carcass to one friend, another breast for another friend, and the legs, thighs and wings for me. I can't wait to nibble on one of my stash today before visiting my friend at the coast and delivering her third.

Good time and great food enjoyed by all.

Pretty as a Picture

The front yard is deliberately not manicured as I want the natural flow of the plants when the wind blows or the rain moistens the ground.

Currently, the Friendship Cacti Garden is getting too much water, but I have a call into the plumber who helped me fix it about adjusting the sprinkler heads.

I am enjoying my landscaping so much that I want to share it. The backyard is an as-yet uncovered courtyard where I can dine, enjoy the chiminea, or (in the future) the water feature.

One day, I'll have an open wooden patio cover, similar to the one that tops the cement slab, and I want to have a fountain that I can hear splashing water over natural desert rocks.

Making Martha Better

Yesterday, Martha and a guest made a simple holiday treat: Ritz crackers dipped in chocolate. At first, I thought ... yuk, but then I thought hmmm, so, on the way home from Friday b'fast, I stopped and bought groceries, including the box of Ritz ($2) and the big hunk 'o melting chocolate (milk chocolate, my favorite, at $2.64).

When I got home, emptied the grocery bags, and set up for making the choco crackers, I glanced at the 1/2 empty jar of marshmallow creme ($1.29), left over from a batch of fudge. I thought why not? So, while the milk choco was slowly melting in the microwave set on power level 1, I globbed some marshmallow creme on the top of a dozen crackers.

My motto is "dare to do the recipe differently."

I dipped the marshmallow side first, then flipped the cracker and finished covering it with the melted chocolate, then set the crackers on the Sil-pat to dry. I did another 2 dozen crackers without the marshmallow creme, but broke one cracker in half to make a tester.

I shoulda covered ALL the crackers with marshmallow before dipping because they are delicious! My choco layer is a bit thick (duh!), but boy, is this a good treat. I got 3 dozen treats for about $6.00, a bargain in anyone's kitchen.

This is so easy to do that a child literally could do it without any parental interference. Next time you think marshmallow treats, think chocolate marshmallow Ritz crackers instead. Really.