Too many choices!
Dancing with the Stars, third big night: who's going home? Let's see. It can't be Cloris Leachman because she's the clown this season, even though she cannot come close to what could be termed an actual dance performance. It can't be the huge black football player for myriad reasons. Cute Kids Kim and Corey have the 'tween audience, so we have to keep them going to up the ratings. And that darned model actress with a bazillion kids can actually dance, so we best be hanging onto her. Carrie Ann hurt the skinny soap star's feelings, so we have to back off her, too, or it'll look like we're mean, rather than just trying to obtain professional dance results from media personalities. Well, there aren't many contestants left (joke), so let's see. Eenie, meenie, minie, mo: Bye, nice has-been TV sitcom actor who sort of looks like Gary Grant and actually tried to dance.
Even Tom and the Starlet look shell-shocked during Day 3 of the BIG KICK-OFF WEEK, can't keep the contestants straight or the banter humorous, and just wish it would all go away. After all, they usually only work 2 hours and anyone can keep up the happy-happy for 2 hours. This week, however, it's been one tough gig: 6, count 'em, 6 hours of live TV! Totally as grueling as actually dancing on 3 consecutive nights of live TV, especially when it's followed up with (gasp) hyping David Blaine's latest (ominous, deep voice here) ... Dance with Death!
Will David Blaine plunge to his death, be mentally retarded after hanging upside down for 60 hours, or blow out his eyeballs? Stay tuned for 2 hours of retrospective, cut with live, on the scene inanity ... but before we have answers to our probing questions about this idiotic stunt, let's see if he can catch a .22 bullet in his mouth! Are you all watching, kiddies? On your mark, get set, fire!
Totally awesome, dude!
Whoa! Who is that dour gloom and doom wrinkled face guy warning us that the economy is collapsing? Who put him on during prime time? And that set? An office with a flag? B-O-R-I-N-G!
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